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Tuesday, May 8, 2012

Summer Movie Preview - May and June

Dear Nurse Dave,
Can you whip together a Summer Movie Preview that lets me know what I need to see?
Ed, Baton Rouge, LA

You've come to the right man Ed.  I think I can walk you through the most important films of the summer.

MAY


The Avengers - I saw this one at 10am on openning day.  The theatre was filled with kids whose parents let them stay home from school to watch the Avengers.  The parents made the right decision, the movie was fantastic.

Dark Shadows - Johnny Depp is a vampire that wakes up in the 1970's and its a comedy.  The laughs come from Johnny Depp's funny make-up and the fact that a witch lady has had a crush on Johnny Depp for several hundred years.  I'd say let the kids go to school.

Battleship - The guy from John Carter is back with an even better movie.  He's on a battleship and aliens start attacking the Earth.  Its up to John Carter to stop the aliens and somehow link this plot to the board game Battleship.  I think he's going to do it.  Take the kids out of school for this one.  It is going to be an amazing ride.

Men In Black 3 - Will Smith makes another daring creative choice here.  This time the plot involves time travel.  The problem is that time travel isn't the solution for revitalizing a bad movie idea.  The Rock is (more on this later).

Moonrise Kingdom - Isn't interesting how many movies feature boyscouts in them without actually being able to use the term, "boyscout." This one has boyscouts probably referred to as Wilderness Patrol or something.  It also has Bill Murray so naturally I'm in.

JUNE

Snow White and the Huntsman - This is another movie with Thor in it.  Except this time I think he uses axes, not a hammer.

Battlefield America - This isn't a sweet alien invasion movie like Battleship and it isn't a sequel to Battle Los Angeles.  No this is according to the trailer, "The most anticipated kid's dance movie of the summer."  Fortunately most kids are out of school by the time this movie premiers so there isn't the moral question of wether or not to take them out of school.

Prometheus - This one has aliens, androids and ancient futuristic mysteries.  All of those things appeal to me on a lot of levels.  Especially androids, we really don't get enough of those.

Brave - Disney's newest princess is Scottish and from what I understand she isn't going to marry just anybody, plus there's a bear involved some how.  I hope that the bear sings a song.

GI Joe 2 - Finally a sequel that gets it right.  Kill off the entire cast from the first movie and then make the Rock the star.  Adding the Rock to a movie has worked every time (Fast 5, Journey 2 the list goes on) and I am certain its going to work this time.   

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