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Wednesday, January 23, 2013


Dear Nurse Dave,
I am Mrs.Shirley Jones,i need your help to transfer 20,142,728.00 Million Dollars I inherited from my husband for more information, Please reply to me at

Mrs. Shirley Jones

Sounds like you're in a bit of pickle Shirley.  What can I do for you?  Do you need a bank account number or perhaps a credit card number?  I have both of those.  Do you need a place to stay while you're waiting for the money?  I've got a van you could sleep in.  Just send me another email with the specifics and I'm in.  Seriously I'm totally in.

Or Shirley are you looking for ideas as to how to spend the money?  I've got those as well.

1. Pay off my student loans.
2. Buy me some of these sandals.
3. Waterbeds
4. an internet publishing company
5. maybe some kind of Willy Wonka Candy Land thing (chocolate rivers are radical).
6. An awesome cave slide like the one from Goonies
7. Pay me to write a script for Waterworld 2
8. a helicopter to avoid traffic
9. Maybe a interesting pet
10. Bathtub full of M&Ms or maybe even a swimming pool
11. One of those Duck vehicles that can drive on land and be a boat
12. Start a museum (about whatever you're interested in, mine would probably be a candy museum wouldn't that be cool?)
13. Rocket Skates
14. Make an outdoor sculpture

There's plenty more ideas.  Just let me know Shirley.  We can do this together.

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